My father was born ¼ Jewish
in 1936 Budapest,
didn't leave country until after the revolution was crushed in 1956. He and his
sister managed to escape to Vienna, where she
stayed,
and he carried on to England.
Met my mother, born in Greenwich, December 1941,
and with the help of her brother, my father got her drunk to have some fun, and
knocked her up. When my mother's family got wind of this, they gave dad an ultimatum, marry mom or be deported back to Hungary. Last I heard from those who still in contact is that he spends much of his free time wondering why he married mom in the 1st place. 50+ year old baggage
A sister ensued, was the 'thing to do' then
and my family emigrated to Canada in 1964, severing any close contact with
mom's family, became issues later but another comment
Father became a workaholic to evade any
domestic responsibly as well as some other fun on the side. Mom became an
alcoholic, wonder why? but was still functional enough to provide and instill
manners, being quite Victorian.
When 4 or 5, my parents were baffled by
me getting caught stealing cookie so often.
But, later, mom overheard my sister
and I talking;
She said, #####, "do you wanna
cookie?"
I would, naturally, say, "sure!"
and then she's say, "get me one too"
While quite immature, she caught on how
to 'play' people, as well as framing me for her stunts. Dad was rarely in a
good mood either, and if things went even slightly wrong, would explode in a
rage, kick things and Xmas toys around, he detested that date, and I became the
convenient scapegoat.
Recall my sister, suggesting that our
parents could "split" at about age 7 for her,
hence she was keen to
what's going on. At that time, I was more in a daydream state
and wasn't getting along great in school or the neighborhood
At 10, my sister was rendered barren by
a pedophile, may have had several other assaults but can't separate from her
possible confabulation now.
We were both entered, without notice or option, into Catholic
School, mine junior high, both single gender, don't
think I need to reveal what happened there.
My mother thought it would be
"better for us", by this time, mostly besotted
At 15, she contracted meningitis, progressing to
epilepsy, ensuing brain surgery to correct that, and kidney failure when given
a drug known that she was allergic to while convalescing.
The trauma of all this, often,
malicious, adversity likely warped her reasoning and turned her
more vengeful femme fatale. She told both our parents , and others, different things for her
advantage, often my detriment too, as well as slash and burn with the boys
Later heard that our parents stayed
together for "The Kids Sake".
Get a better handle on the psychodynamics if you know European history,
my
parents' parents, endured, WW1 and events Inter-War too
Ergo generational PTSD, which I read as;
Post-Trauma SURVIVOR Disposition, have an entry on Urban Dictionary,
http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Post-Trauma+Survivor+Disposition
but I've started Recovering, rapidly
too, a few years ago
"Some people use Religion to avoid
going to Hell,
Others get Spiritual after Being There"
"What a long, strange trip its been" - ♫ Truckin' ♪ - Grateful Dead
"You've come a long way baby" - Virginia Slims slogan
More to follow
